20 February 2018 - How to Get Away with Stain Removal

Removing Lipstick from Napkins

"Women who really ought to know better invariably wipe their lips and their lipstick on the monogramming of your best napkins."

Lipstick is a basic combination of wax, a pigment, and other ingredients.

Now

You rub that shit all over my monogrammed napkins and you will think that you attended the dinner party of the devil himself.

I'm just joking.

I don't own monogrammed napkins. I have disposable napkins from IKEA. You can rub your tinted lip wax all over that. I don't give AF.

...

Let's just say for our almanac theme today that this happened.

All you need is some household ammonia. Dip your lip soiled napkins in some ammonia to cut the grease and the stain should come out with regular washing.

...

Here are some fun facts about lipstick.

In the year 2010, the FDA took about 400 lipsticks available on the US market and tested them. The test found 1.11 ppm (parts per million) traces of lead.

Now lead isn't an ingredient found on the lipstick but it sure was found in the tests.

The lipstick with the highest amounts of lead was Maybelline's Color Sensational 125 - Pink Petal. This had about 7.19 ppm of lead.

Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Lead Poisoning!

Also!

Cosmetics are a great way of leaving behind evidence at a crime scene.

So remember not to have a smoke or drink a glass of wine and just leave it at the scene of a crime. It is possible to get saliva from lipstick and get a DNA sample.

So there you go! Lipstick is killer on monogrammed napkins, but you don't have to be pegged as a killer if you use these tips to clean the crime scene.

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Almanac for Homemakers

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